A Lady's Choice
by Vicky Ocean
Summary: Mazzic asks Shada to return to his organization post-HoT. Talon Karrde/Shada D'Ukal. Part 4 of Scenes From A Peculiar Affair series.
1. Chapter 1

A/N- Shada and Karrde have eaten my brain. I can't stop thinking about them.

* * *

**Setting:** About a year after Timothy Zahn's _Hand of Thrawn_ Duology

* * *

Shada and Karrde were having a late dinner at a tapcafe on the Diamond Level of the _Errant Venture_ after having spent the majority their day meeting with Booster Terrick and several of their other contacts.

As always, Shada kept one eye on the entrance of the tapcafe as she and Karrde ate their dinner. She froze for a moment when she saw Mazzic enter. This was going to be awkward. She hadn't seen Mazzic since she had resigned from his organization nearly a year ago.

Karrde felt her stiffen beside him and looked up from the remains of his meal to see what had caught her attention. "Ah, our friend Mazzic." He put his utensils down and stood as Mazzic approached.

"Booster said you'd be here," Mazzic said by way of greeting.

"And so we are." Karrde shook his hand and offered him the chair across the table from them. "Please join us."

Mazzic sat and focused on Shada offering her a tight smile. "Shada, it's good to see you again."

"You too, Mazzic."

Karrde took his seat beside Shada again. "I'm afraid we're done with our meal, but will you have a drink with us?" He was, as always, unfailingly hospitable.

"Yeah, sure," Mazzic said absently. He couldn't seem to keep his eyes off of Shada. It made her more than a little uncomfortable. After a few moments, he regained his focus and turned to Karrde. "Actually, I'd like a word with Shada if you don't mind."

"Of course," Karrde said easily. "I'm sure you two have much to catch up on." He placed several credit chips on the table and stood. "If you'll excuse me. I'll see you back on the ship, my dear."

Shada watched him leave, vaguely irritated that he had left her to deal with what was sure to be an unpleasant conversation. Physical confrontations she had no problems dealing with, but this type of thing was another matter entirely.

"You look different," Mazzic told her.

Shada looked down at herself. Her pale blue shirt and black nerf hide jacket were much more conservative than what she had normally worn when she worked for Mazzic even for a casual dinner. She shrugged. "Karrde's style isn't quite as flashy as yours." That was true. Karrde generally liked to blend in, rather than draw attention to himself unlike Mazzic.

"It suits you. You look good. Happy. You like working for Karrde?"

"Yes, it's been an interesting experience," she said diplomatically.

"I'm sure it has. Karrde's a real piece of work."

Shada decided it would be best if she didn't comment on that.

"I know I was angry when you left. At the time, I didn't really understand what was going on, but I wanted to tell you that I really appreciate what you did for me. What you gave up to save me. I've been wanting to thank you for a long time," he told her sincerely.

Shada smiled. "You're welcome. I was your bodyguard. It was my job."

"Yeah, but most people wouldn't have done that. But you've never been most people have you?"

"I suppose not," she conceded.

Mazzic reached out and took her hand, stroking it as had been his habit.

"Don't do that," she said pulling her hand back.

"Sorry." He took a deep breath. "Look, I want you to come back and work for me. I'll double whatever Karrde's paying you."

"Mazzic, I can't just go back to being a smuggler's bodyguard again. I want more than that."

"I'll give you a ship if that's what you want, but I want you back."

"I'm sorry, Mazzic. I just can't go back. Karrde's doing something important with his information bureau and I want to help."

Mazzic crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back in his chair. "It'll never work in the long run. You know that."

"Maybe not. But I want to see it through."

"Well, I can't argue with your loyalty since it saved my life. Do me a favor though and think about it. For old times sake."

"I will," she told him, even though she knew that no amount of thinking would change her mind.

"Good," he nodded. "I'll be kicking around here for a couple of days while we wait for our cargo, so I'll check back with you before I leave."

* * *

She found Karrde sitting in his office absently stroking his beard and staring blankly into space despite the pile of datapads on his desk. He studied her with cool interest as she lurked in his doorway.

"Mazzic asked me to rejoin him," she told him.

"Will you be leaving us?" He asked, keeping his voice carefully disinterested. But she heard the words he wanted to ask anyway, _Will you be leaving me?_

"No."

"Why not? You were with him for over a decade. Time like that engenders a lot of loyalty."

"Do you want me to leave?"

"No, I value your skills far too much."

"My skills?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

"You are a very valuable part of my organization."

"I see." She looked away from him. She didn't know why she expected Karrde to give voice to his feelings. He guarded them even closer than she did.

"You are very valuable to _me_, Shada," he said quietly. "But I won't try to stop you if you truly want to leave."

She looked up and caught his eye. For once his pale blue eyes were unguarded and she saw the fear lurking there. "I don't want to leave."

She watched the tension ease out of him and he smiled at her. "Good." He held out his hand to her and she moved around to the other side of his desk to take it. He brought hers to his lips, placing a fervent kiss on back of her hand. "Will you stay with me tonight?" he asked.

He never took her favors for granted and always asked permission to be with her. It seemed a strange courtesy, especially since she'd never refused him, but he was always careful never to pressure her. This facet of their relationship was still new and seemed very delicate.

"Yes."

* * *

That night he was possessive in a way he'd never exhibited before with her. Shada knew she would find herself covered in the marks of his possession the next morning. Not that she minded particularly, his back was likely covered with scratches from her own passion. She had to admit she liked seeing him lose his careful control for once.

Afterwards, she lay in his arms almost lulled to sleep by the rhythmic motion of his fingers combing through her hair. Lying sated in the arms of Talon Karrde was the last place she expected to be a year ago.

This time last year, she was still a Mistryl Shadow Guard serving as Mazzic's bodyguard and that seemed likely not to change. Then her Mistryl sisters had turned against her and her world fell apart. Karrde had given her a purpose again and his quiet, steady support as she picked up the pieces of her life again.

There had always been a spark of attraction between them, even when they had first met ages ago during the Thrawn Crisis. That attraction had continued to grow more intense the longer they worked together. Until one day, with the exhilaration following a rather daring caper and both feeling particularly pleased with themselves and each other, their attraction could no longer be denied. Karrde had shocked her by pulling her into his arms and kissing her in triumph and she had responded in kind. He had pulled away from her, panting slightly, "Tell me to stop."

"Don't stop," she had told him pulling him back to her. And that was the beginning of their rather peculiar affair. They had both guarded their hearts so closely for so long that they found it difficult to let those old habits go.

* * *

The next morning, Shada was standing in front of the mirror in the refresher dabbing bacta on the numerous bruises marring the pale skin of her neck and chest. "I'm not going to be able to leave the ship today," she said quietly to herself with a sigh.

"I'm sorry, my darling," Karrde said coming up behind her and sliding his arms around her waist.

"No, you're not. Whether it was deliberate or not, you wanted everyone to know I belong to you, especially Mazzic," she told him meeting his gaze in the mirror.

He had the good grace to look slightly embarrassed. "I'm a selfish man, Shada. What more can I say."

"Nothing." She shook her head slightly and smiled. "I suspect I left my marks on you as well. Let me see your back."

He released her and turned around. Sure enough his back was covered in little red crescents and long scratches from her nails. "Oww."

"So much pleasure is worth a little pain."

She didn't know how to respond to that so she said nothing. She gently rubbed bacta on his scratches. "Let that dry before you put your shirt on."

"Thank you." He turned back to her, reaching out to push her dark hair out of her face before leaning down to kiss her.

* * *

Shada hadn't been able to find a shirt with a high enough collar to cover the bruises on her neck. So she put on a scarf, wearing it in a rakish style reminiscent of the fighter pilots in the old holo serials. Hopefully, no one would comment on her obvious effort at concealment.

After she had made herself presentable, she went to the ward room and had her morning caf and a bowl of fruit. A short time later, Karrde wandered in pulling on his jacket. He poured himself a cup of caf and joined her at the table. "What a lovely scarf," he told her with a devilish twinkle in his eye.

"I'd watch it if I were you, Captain Karrde," she said pointing her fork at him menacingly.

"Oh, indeed?" He grinned as he stole a piece of fruit from her bowl and popped it into his mouth. "Or what?"

"Or I'll-" She stopped as Aves entered with a datapad in his hand.

"Here's the information you wanted, Boss. Odonnl says that's everything."

"Thank you, Aves," Karrde said accepting the datapad. He took a sip of caf as he started scrolling through the information

"No problem." Aves walked out and then stuck his head back in a moment later. "Oh, yeah, one more thing. You two," he said motioning between Shada and Karrde, "are not fooling anybody."

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

Mirax Terrick Horn found her father in Trader's Alley watching Mazzic and Karrde preen in front of Shada. Karrde in his subtle way and Mazzic in his over the top way. Shada appeared not to notice either of them in the least as she surveyed the wares of a weapon stall.

"I swear they're one step away from whipping their cocks out for comparison," Booster commented to his daughter as they surveyed the scene before them.

Mirax choked on a startled laugh. "Oh, come on, Booster. You know Karrde would never be so vulgar. Although, I do have a nice set of antique Mandelorian dueling blasters he may be interested in."

"I should lay some odds down. This is more entertaining than two Gundarks in a sand pit."

"Poor Shada. I think I'll rescue her before she smacks them both." Mirax left her father and walked toward the trio. "Good morning," she said as they all turned their attention to her arrival. "I wonder if I can steal Shada away from you gentlemen for a bit. I just acquired some Hapan hair ornaments and I'd like her opinion on them. Several look like they could be quite deadly."

Shada said glancing at Karrde, "Ah, well, we were just on our way to a meeting. Maybe-"

"Go along with Mirax," he told her. "I can handle the meeting."

"Are you sure?"

"I have done this before," he said dryly.

Shada shot him an irritated glare. "Well, then, I'll see you later. Good bye, Mazzic," she said and then quickly followed Mirax down the corridor. "Thank you," she said to Mirax when they were out of earshot. "I owe you one."

Mirax laughed, "No problem."

* * *

Karrde and Mazzic watched as Shada escaped with Mirax. Karrde wished she had been thoughtful enough to rescue him as well. He really did not want to have the conversation he knew was coming.

"I want Shada back."

Karrde focused his attention back on Mazzic. "Yes, she told me."

"Will you let her go?"

"I have no say in the matter," he said evenly. "She may stay or go as she pleases."

"Don't give me that. You've got her in your thrall."

"My thrall? What am I? A Sith Lord?" Karrde asked with some amusement.

"You know what I mean, Karrde," Mazzic said beginning to show his irritation. "She was with me for twelve years. I find it hard to believe that she wouldn't want to come back now that things have settled down for her."

"Perhaps you should have recognized her myriad of remarkable abilities during that time instead of merely utilizing her as a decorative bodyguard."

"I told her I would give her a ship if she wanted it."

"As I said, she's the mistress of her own fate. I won't stand in her way, but I won't push her away either."

"You've had your eye on her all these years, haven't you?" Mazzic accused him. "Just waiting to steal her away."

Karrde laughed. That was certainly true. Shada had intrigued him on multiple levels ever since that ambush on Trogan. "Of course I have, Mazzic. I would be a fool not to want a woman of such extraordinary talent in my organization."

"Well, don't expect her to fall into your bed. She's cold as Hoth in that regard."

"That comment is beneath you, Mazzic," Karrde said, his voice turning frosty. But if he was honest with himself, the possessive part of him that had surfaced last night felt triumphant upon learning that Mazzic had never had a physical relationship with her. Karrde kept his expression carefully neutral.

"Yeah, well, probably. I'm just warning you." Mazzic eyed him a long moment. "You're a cold bastard, Karrde. I suppose you're well suited to each other." Mazzic held out his hand. "Take care of her."

Relieved that this confrontation seemed to be over with, Karrde took his outstretched hand and shook it. "Of course."

"And I'll be after your hide if you let anything happen to her."

"As well you should," Karrde agreed easily. He was relieved that Mazzic seemed to take it so well. He really didn't want any conflict between their organizations. Mazzic had always been useful to have on his side. He was also glad that that Shada would have Mazzic to fall back on if anything happed to him and his organization.

* * *

Much later, Karrde found Shada still hiding away in Mirax's office.

"Karrde, come in and sample this Sapir tea with us," Mirax greeted him as he entered the space crowded with all manner of exotic goods.

"Thank you, Mirax." He sat beside Shada on the sofa and took the delicate ceramic cup Mirax offered him. He took a sip and said, "It's very nice."

"I think so too. It's a variety they don't export very much."

"I can see why."

"Here, have a cookie," she held out a plate to him.

"Thanks. I'm glad I arrived just in time for refreshments." He glanced at Shada. "I didn't exactly have time for breakfast."

She rolled her eyes. "That wasn't my fault."

"Perhaps not." A smiled toyed at the corners of his mouth.

"Did everything go well?" she asked attempting to deflect further flirtatious comments from him. He knew she wasn't really comfortable exposing that aspect of their relationship to outsiders yet, even to a friend like Mirax.

"Of course." He took another cookie off the plate. "We need to meet up with another of Booster's contacts tonight."

"Alright."

Mirax poured them more tea and he leaned closer to her desk examining the hair ornaments laid out on a cloth there. "These are lovely. Where'd you come by them?" he asked her.

"Karrde, you should know better than to ask a question like that," Mirax told him with a sly smile.

"So I do, but it never hurts to try." He turned to Shada. "Did you see anything you like?"

"Oh, well, I don't really need anything like these. They're more for show than actually useful as weapons."

"That wasn't the question," he said gently.

Her eyes darted back over the collection and stopped over a pair of silver ones decorated with dangling beads of rare lavender coral carved in the shape of a Hapan aquatic lily. Karrde picked them up. "Yes, those would look exquisite on you."

There was something about Shada's elaborate hairstyles that he found incredibly erotic. The delicate curve of her neck exposed by her pinned up hair drove him to distraction at times. He loved pulling the pins out at the end of the night and watching her long hair cascade about her. The contrast of seeing someone so put together come undone never failed to excite him. He shifted a little uncomfortably just thinking about it. "So, Mirax, what else do you have to tempt us with before we get down to bargaining?"

Mirax grinned. "Many things."

* * *

Karrde's hand was warm on her back through the thin silk of her tunic as he guided her through the crowd of the tapcafe to the bar. When they reached the bar, he stood close behind her buffering her from the press of the crowd. It was not the best position for them to be in for her to guard him, but she found it easier to work around his chivalrous tendencies than to argue with him about them.

He reached around her and picked up his drink from off the bar. She tried to ignore the way the movement pressed him even closer to her. He took a sip and set the drink back down on the bar in front of her. She felt him reach up and touch one of the dangling beads of her newly acquired hair ornaments. "I can't wait to take these out of your hair tonight." His breath was hot on her ear and she had to stop herself from shivering with arousal.

She turned her head slightly and asked, "Who said I was going to let you?" Out of the corner of her eye she saw him grin at the defiance in her voice.

"A challenge then. I like that."

She kept her eyes focused on the other patrons milling about them. "Don't you think we should focus on the task at hand?"

"Seducing you?" he asked and she could feel the whisper of his lips on the back of her neck.

"No, finding our contact."

"I'm a remarkable multi-tasker, my dear. I can do both."

"Perhaps, I don't want to have only half of your attention," she countered.

"Oh, I assure you-" He broke off and suddenly he was all business again, "There he is."

Shada took a deep breath to calm herself and tracked their contact's movements through the crowd.

* * *

Karrde didn't get a chance to devote his whole attention to her. As soon they had finished with their contact, Aves had called asking him to return to the ship. Then Shada went and briefed Booster on what they had learned.

She was waiting for the turbo lift that would take her back to the hanger bay where the _Wild Karrde_ was berthed. When the lift doors finally opened she was more than a little surprised to see Mazzic slouching against the back of the lift car. "Mazzic, are you stalking me?" she asked with a surprised laugh.

"Shada? No, not intentionally. But I'm glad I saw you before I left." He straightened up and smiled at her. She stepped in to the car and entered in her destination. He took in her appearance from high heeled boots to her lavender shimmer silk tunic to the softly clinking beads of her hair ornaments. "Going out?"

"Turning in actually."

"Ah. Look, Shada, I know you're not going to change your mind about staying with Karrde."

"I'm sorry, Mazzic."

"It's okay. I understand. I really do. I just wanted to tell you that if you ever want to come back you'll always have a place no matter what. And if Karrde ever does anything to hurt you, you let me know and I'll take care of him. I mean it." It was rather absurd that Mazzic thought he could do anything in that regard that Shada couldn't do herself, but she appreciated the sentiment none the less. "And if you are ever in any kind of trouble, I promise I will help you any way I can. Just call and I'll be there."

"Thank you, Mazzic," she said sincerely. "That means more than I can say."

The lift door opened at his stop and before he exited Mazzic said, "Don't forget. Anytime for anything."

"I won't." She smiled at him. She was happy that there were no hard feelings between them. Mazzic had been a large part of her life. She had never wanted to hurt him, though she suspected that his ego was a bit bruised.

The doors closed and she was alone again. It felt like the last string from her past had been cut and she felt strangely melancholy. The darkness that had settled on her when the Mistryl cast her out came creeping back.

She took the long way back to the docking bay and just wandered around for a while thinking about the things in her life that had brought her to this unexpected place. This was certainly not how she imagined her life would turn out when she had been a young girl and dedicated her life to the Mistryl Shadow Guard.

* * *

Shada knocked on Karrde's door. He answered already dressed for bed in an open robe and sleep pants. He gave her a delighted smile when he saw her. "I was just about to have glass of that brandy we got from Mirax. Will you join me?"

She slipped in through the door and paused close to him reaching out to straighten the slightly askew collar of his robe. She glanced up at him feeling suddenly shy. "Could I stay with you tonight?" It was the first time she'd ever asked him.

"You never have to ask," he said caressing her cheek with the back of his hand.

"Neither do you." She slid her arms around him and he gathered her close to him. She rested her head on his shoulder and relaxed into his embrace. He held her close for a long time one hand massaging the tense muscles in her neck and shoulders.

"Are you alright?" he murmured into her hair.

"Just feeling a little adrift, I suppose."

"Mazzic's gone?"

"Yes." She sighed deeply. "I'm sorry. I don't mean to be so- so-" she couldn't seem to think of the right word.

"Twelve years is a long time to work with someone. You have a right to feel sad."

"I know, but I thought I was over all that. It's not like I want to go back. I enjoy what I'm doing now more than I ever did being Mazzic's bodyguard." She looked up at him, reaching up to stroke his bearded cheek. "Not to mention this thing between us. And you were there when no one else wanted me."

"I will always want you," he told her.

"Don't make promises you can't keep," she cautioned, unwilling to believe he truly meant that.

"You should know by now, that I never do that. This is not just a dalliance for me, Shada." He turned his head slightly and kissed the palm of her hand.

She knew that he had just promised her more than most other men promised in their marriage vows. She knew that kind of commitment should terrify her, but it didn't. It made her feel unspeakably calm and secure. She smiled up at him. "Talon, take my hair down."

He smiled as he reached up to pull her hair pins out.

* * *

Shada lay half sprawled on him feeling nearly boneless. Karrde had an arm around her and his hand was tracing idle patterns on her bare back. An unexpected laugh rumbled in his chest.

"What?" she asked sleepily.

"Oh, was just thinking about Mazzic. He warned me today not to expect you to fall into bed with me."

"And did you tell I him already did?"

"I won't say I wasn't tempted, but no."

She propped herself up on her elbow and looked down at him, no longer feeling sleepy. "So when I started working for you, did you expect me to fall into bed with you?"

"No, it was a delightful surprise." He reached up and pushed her hair out of her face, tucking it behind her ear.

"Is that the truth?"

"Well, I can't deny I have always found you appealing, my darling. Ever since seeing you in action on Trogan. But I had a personal rule never to mix business with pleasure, especially with someone in my employ. I tried very hard to resist you, but I couldn't seem to help myself." He laughed again, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "I had actually been surprised I didn't come away from that first kiss with some very important pieces of my anatomy missing as I had heard happened with you before."

Shada laughed and flushed slightly when she realized what event he was referring to. "You heard about that?"

"Oh, yes. I remember Mara being particularly entertained by that story."

"One has to set the tone for such things early in an assignment. So you were duly warned of the possible outcome and just decided to tempt fate."

"I'm very observant, Shada. I couldn't help, but notice that the attraction was quite mutual. If not, I'd have just kept things to myself. I'm happy I didn't have to."

"Me too." She leaned down and gave him a soft lingering kiss.

The End


End file.
